Multi-Cultural Parenting and Trans-Cultural Adoption
Adopting a child of a different culture or color doesn’t mean that the burden is now on the child to learn to fit into your family and culture. It means that the family is now a bi- or multicultural family, and providing your child of color the unspoken message of all families — that they are a part of your whole unit — will take significantly more thinking and planning. Similar to first-generation immigrants who keep their culture alive while learning their new culture, but in reverse, parents will need to embrace their child’s culture as their own and weave it into their family’s everyday life
How you view things going on in your community, nation and the world should now be from two perspectives. In minority families, there is a lot of discussion about what the majority is doing and how it affects them and how to respond. Your child needs this kind of critical thinking and perspective so that when they are young adults, they know how to cope when they encounter racist judgments and stereotypes. As young adults leaving home, transracial adoptees have often expressed that they don’t feel like they fit in anywhere. Research shows that they don’t feel accepted by their ethnic groups or “white” groups. But by fostering multiculturalism in your family and embracing the culture and complex identity of your adopted child, you can help lessen the lifelong impact of trans-cultural and transracial adoption — and empower your child to feel more comfortable in their own skin.
More Information and Resources:
Important Conversations Regarding Race and Child Welfare
It's important for parents who are considering this to really be honest with themselves about whether or not this is a reflection on their own internalized racism, why it is they think those things, and what messages they might be delivering to their kids.
Adoption, Race, and Where’s the Hairbrush?
African hair has always had specific political and cultural meaning. “The braids on black people’s heads in pre-colonial Africa were like very detailed ID cards. They showed everything from tribal affiliations to how much wealth a person had,”
Confronting Your Own Inner Racism when Considering Adoption
It's important for parents who are considering this to really be honest with themselves about whether or not this is a reflection on their own internalized racism, why it is they think those things, and what messages they might be delivering to their kids.
Four Tips and Resources for "Post-Race" Parenting
Terry Keleher is a parent and racial justice educator with the Applied Research Center, which publishes ColorLines.com. Read his essay on being a white father of an adopted black son here. Below, he offers some actionable advice for racially conscious parenting in a supposedly colorblind world.
Beyond Culture Camp: Promoting Positive Identity Formation in Adoption
Donaldson Adoption Institute's major study on identity formation for adopted persons. This groundbreaking work provides significant information and insights on a range of issues relating to adoption, particularly across racial lines.
America Soured on My Multiracial Family
We quickly discovered that if you’re the white parents of an adopted black child, and you’re in the public eye at all, men and women will viciously criticize you for having the audacity to believe that you can raise your kid.
Empowering Adopted Children of Color in the Face of Racism and Discrimination
While a white parent may be able to feel grief or feel brokenhearted about incidents that cause racial trauma, the difference is that they do not feel vulnerable or targeted. Being able to honestly acknowledge that you, as a parent, cannot understand the incident in the same way, while also showing compassion, will encourage children and teens to openly discuss these incidents when they do occur.
Tips on Cross Cultural/Trans Racial Adoption
The parents may feel that the adoption was a success because they loved the child, the child has appeared to do well in life, and the family has never faced significant issues related to the racial or cultural challenge.
The Adopted Life
The Adopted Life Episodes feature 1-on-1 conversations between Angela and transracially adopted teens. They discuss race, culture and birth parent relationships. This series elevates and normalizes the adoptee voice.
Should White People Adopt Black Kids?
Originally aired July of 2019: Jada Pinkedtt Smith and mother Adrienne Banfield-Norris speak to Kristin Davis as she shares her experiences of being a white mother raising black children.
Hair and Skin Care for African American and Biracial Children
With some exceptions, AfricanAmerican hair is usually coarser in texture, tighter in curl pattern and more delicate and vulnerable to damage from environmental and chemical treatments.
Developing A Hair Routine for your African American Child’s Hair
Some parents of multiracial families with black or biracial children report that a great deal of pressure in this area falls on them. They find that their parenting skills are often judged by their ability to care for and style their child’s hair and that the pressure and scrutiny from others is strong.