What all of our kids have in common - all of the kids available for adoption - is the experience of abandonment. Our kids have been abandoned before having any of that; our kids are often abandoned at an age so young that they don't even have words yet. Adoption ends the experience of being abandoned, but the effects of the abandonment still remain.
Between the ages of eight and 10, children have enough biological facts to understand that their birth parents are real people, out there somewhere, even if they don’t know who they are. stirs emotions, from incredulity to sadness, disappointment, anger, confusion, and guilt. Kids at this stage may not always express their feelings, so parents should watch for fantasies, and help their child work through his story.
hildren need to know the truth about their lives starting immediately. It is never to early to start talking to your children about adoption and how they came to be in your family.
The parent and child in an adoptive family have an unshared genetic and social history that all must take into account. All should understand the seven core issues of adoption and know that they resurface often in the lives of any member of the adoption triad.
Here are a few tips on preparing children already in the family for a new, adopted sibling or cousin. The advice to other family members can by applied to children as well.
Adopted children aren’t crazy or unloving if they feel sad or angry or fearful - let them know that. No one can make these children’s losses smaller by suppressing them - caring adults can, however, help them to make the rest of their lives bigger.
The Seven Core Issues of Adoption and Intergenerational Issues in Adoption developed by Sharon Kaplan Roszia and Deborah Silverstein addresses many of the adoptee and the birth parents fears and doubts.
Important questions you should ask yourself and your family before you adopt.
Here are a few tips on preparing children already in the family for a new, adopted sibling or cousin. The advice to other family members can by applied to children as well.
Adoptive families are indeed different. Assuredly, they are not less-than nor second-best, but they are different from families created by birth. Here we pinpointed eight areas of difference:
